Monday, November 17, 2008

I saw comedian Lewis Black this morning. He was carrying a breakfast sandwich and muttering.

Never say "Well that was easy!" after putting your child to bed.

Don't reach for that glass of wine, all smug over the fact that the baby went down in record time. Don't wander over the the computer to check Facebook, all rosy with Day Over, content to crow that the boy was even a little bit awake (just like in the books!) because I guarantee, five minutes later:

"Mama?"

"Hi! Hihihihihi! Mama?"

Oh maaamaaa...

Is there some sort of 11 month milestone that I've missed? One that causes extreme alertness? Because dude does not-does not-does noooooot want to sleep anymore. Night time is still bearable (after I go back in he usually conks out quick) but naps? Please. I've been off the sleep books for awhile but I thought that nearly-11 month olds were only supposed to be going 2 1/2 - 3 hours between sleeps. Am I behind the times? Because baby is having none of that. He might handle a 3 hour before his first nap but that second one... He'll easily go four, sometimes more. (Sometimes there won't be any nap at all and he'll go for seven or eight hours before collapsing in a heap at 5:45, even though mama and dada did their DAMNDEST to convince the boy that sleep was necessary. Love those days.)

He CAN'T be transitioning to one nap. He can't. I won't allow it. Maybe it's the teething or the constant urge to stand (with help from mama. We've just mastered crawling; walking is probably still a ways away) or maybe there's a neurological thing I just don't know about but I can't for the life of me figure out how to control these naps. I'm trying very hard to let him lead but it's frustrating not knowing when my next break is. (That's what naps are really for, right?) Bless those of you who were able to get your kid on a schedule but my boy wants nothing to do with that nonsense. TRY AS I MIGHT. Plus I have a child who gives no sleep signals. None. Once in a blue, blue moon I'll get a yawn or a half-hearted eye rub but usually all I have to go on is my gut and a slight pinkish hue around the eyes. And Weissbluth's "9 and 1" schedule can bite my ass. Bite it. BITE. IT.

Is this normal? Is there some crazy developmental thing that I missed? And is there a magic elf who will clean my house and cook my meals so that I can blog during naps instead of work because I'm really wanting one of those.

11 comments:

Bern said...

Sorry to say, both of my kids transitioned to one nap a day around the time they turned one. Which means a little but of a grumpy lag until it all smooths out.

Ali said...

No! Nooooooooo!

Missy said...

You know I was all upset at first when my kids went from two naps down to one, but soon I began to appreciate not being tied to the nap so much. I felt an increased sense of freedom in a way. Maybe that missing nap time becomes errand or get out of the house time. If that is even what is going on here. I think my kids were closer to 15 months when they gave up the morning nap. But hell it has been long enough now I am probably not a reliable source.

Ali said...

The thing is, once he DOES go to sleep he sleeps for a really long time. So I don't think it's that he doesn't need it, I just think... hell, I don't know what to think. (Other than WTF?)

electriclady said...

BG went back and forth between two naps and one for what seemed like months. She ended up on this sort of hybrid schedule where she naps from 11-2, which is terribly inconvenient.

Valerie said...

I'll have to look it up on the blog when the boys transitioned, er we transitioned the boys, to one nap but it wasn't too long after one.... oh yeah looked it up it was at 13 months.

And fighting for two naps is much harder than easily going down for one nap. Much harder. It ended up being easier than I thought going to one.

Now the boys still slowed down in the morning around the morning naptime so I gave them bottles of milk and we rocked in the easy chair and just cuddled or read books. Sometimes they would fall asleep there but not for long.

And pretty soon they didn't need even that.

Also I remember reading on somebody's blog that a good rhythm with two naps is increasing times of awakeness between sleeping so Up for 2 hours down for first nap up for 3-4 hrs down for nap up for 4-5 hrs then bedtime. I haven't worked out the math but it was something like that. This might be for much younger babies though :)

Valerie said...

Oh yeah, and *&^$$^%$! your boy is almost 1 years old now?

good golly...

filthEdesign said...

i love lewis black :)

Victoria said...

Sweet Jeebus, I coulda writ this. I keep hoping someone will answer your problems, because then I'd know what to do myself. My 11-m.o. girl is a scream monster, and we showed up to her little music class with her face still red from the horror! the horror! of my asking her to try, please, to finish her morning nap.

So now all the other kids she knows are going to go to one nap by next year, and I'm not sure how we're going to get those non-schedules to mesh. But first, the bloodcurdling screams, they must stop.

Marinka said...

OMG, my kids are so old that I can't remember naps.
But reaching for the glass of wine is always a fantastic thing, in my book.

Ali said...

Amen about the wine, Marinka, but I can't think about the day that I won't remember naps...

(Hilarious profile, BTW.)