Saturday, September 20, 2008

More venting!

Wowee wow wow, peeps. Friday night was a doozy. That whole, "yeah, I'm off to bed now" thing I thought I was doing after logging off last? Please. Baby Homeslice is nursing some sort of crazy voodoo curse that forces him to crawl instead of sleep. I know I'm OMG-ing this crawling-while-sleeping thing to death but kiddo was up EVERY 40 MINUTES. We haven't had that kind of misery since Month Three. Every 40 minutes there he'd be, sobbing in his crib, rocking back and forth on all fours. This went on from 6 pm until almost 2 am. The poor kid was practically hysterical by the end, and frankly so were we. Finally we decided to give him some Infants Motrin (he was also grinding his teeth really hard) and that conked him out until 6:45 am. Today it's back to the 40 minute naps with long stretches of whining and frustration in between. I've done enough reading to know that this is just a phase and nothing to get all panty-twisted about, but whenever things are going wonky I immediately assume that it's permanent. (My child will never self-soothe again, he'll co-sleep forever and we'll spend the next 18 years waking up every 40 minutes!) Everybody says that once he's able to crawl he'll sleep beautifully, perhaps even better than before, and man, I'm ready for that. Have you seen the ballet "The Red Shoes"? In it, a woman buys a pair of red shoes that she can never take off and they force her to dance until she dies of exhaustion. That's what this crawling thing reminds me of. I've actually had to start holding him down during sleep to keep his body from forcing him up on all fours. I'm not sure how to help him with this. Can you teach a kid to crawl? Technically he has done it but most of the time he gets the legs going and ends up in Down Dog. Then he gives up and just belly crawls to whatever it is he wants. But he's trying... Really, really trying...

Speaking of trying (emotionally, at least) - the whining? MAN. I completely understand how hard it is to be a baby, I'm super sympathetic, but the boy has recently latched onto a certain pitch that short circuits my sanity. Actually, there's been a whole lot of button pushing going on lately. I don't know if it's him or me but I'm finding it very hard to be the Mother I Want To Be lately. He's definitely asserting himself, which is fantastic. Theoretically. In practice... Is it horrible to admit that it's kind of maddening? Take the nap I just finished putting him down for (that was a horribly constructed sentence); he was super, super tired (overtired, probably) and would not sleep. He has discovered that he can push himself away from me and so now when I'm trying to rock him, all he wants to do is straighten his arms (or his legs. That's my faaaaavorite) so that I can't hold him. Then he cries and flings his head on my chest and rubs his eyes and babbles baby nonsense about how he doesn't WANT to go to bed until I get fed up and put him in the crib for a Time Out (which, as we all know, is totally for me). Finally I dosed him with Infant Motrin and sang songs with lyrics and he drifted off. But it bugged me, you know? It bugs me when he acts willful, which is a terrible thing to admit. I should be grateful that I have a kid who's ABLE to act willful! Of course then I started spiriling about what a lousy parent I am and how I'm going to ruin my child for life and I shouldn't have gotten so mad when he kicked at me when he was on the changing table because he wasn't really kicking AT me, even though he scowled and grunted and aimed for me, and I REALLY shouldn't have swatted him with his blankie because of it (really shouldn't have done that...) and on and on until I exhausted myself with self-doubt.

I didn't think this crap started until he was 2. What gives, yo? Anyone else feeling like a shitty parent this week?

(Off topic - I need to find something else to relieve teething/growing pain. I feel like I'm constantly giving him pain relievers and as someone who believes in medicating only when necessary, this much Motrin makes me nervous. Frozen teethers work okay - I know you're not supposed to freeze them but he's not interested unless they're really cold. I always wet them so they won't stick to his gums and I hold them so his fingers don't freeze. He absolutely refuses to open up for Orajel but all the homeopathic stuff but seem about as effective as lip balm. What did you do when the teething got bad? Also, if anyone knows how to cook cauliflower for baby food so that it doesn't stink up the joint, I'm all ears.)

9 comments:

Missy said...

We used orajel some, but really the tylenol and advil worked the best. I too am no fan of medicating unless necessary. That goes for me and my kids.I would alternate types of pain relievers too, during those times when dosing had to happen frequently. I would give tylenol one time, and motrin or advil the next.That made me feel less like I was doping them up for some reason. I also tried to time it so that the ibuprofen was given at night as it usually will last 6-8 hours as opposed to tylenol's four. The frozen teethers just never quite seemed to do the trick. Our bouts of really bad teething were infrequent so I kind of looked on it as an illness. If the child had the flu and was running a fever was causing misery, you really don't think twice about bringing on the meds. I kind of looked at teething the same way, if they really seemed miserable then bring it on. No sense in everyone being miserable. Hope things get better soon.

Ali said...

Aw, it'll be fine. Sometimes (okay, a lot of times) a girl's just got to vent.

How's your girl's finger?!

Missy said...

Stitches are out, it looks kinda yucky. A lovely scab has formed and there is a nasty bruise. Loss of a fingernail is yet to be determined. She had on dark purple nailpolish so it is hard to tell what happened there. She is in a splint for the next two weeks and then that should be that. Thanks for asking.

Ali said...

That girl is a trouper. That girl's parents? Also troupers.

Fraulicious said...

This vibrating teether is a big hit in our house, even now that my little one has four teeth.

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00002JV9S?smid=A1HBR2G6AYLBTG&tag=dealtime-toys-20&linkCode=asn

Ali said...

I'M TOTALLY GETTING THAT! Good one, Fraulicious! (And welcome!)

jessica star said...

Volunteering myself as an equally shitty parent and also completely obsessed with level of said shittiness.

Through circumstance and necessity, I am "teaching" my little guy to take naps in his crib from now on and not in his favorite little lounging vibrating chair. Poor boy is just too big for it. I hope he doesn't remember any of this. I hope I don't, either.

Commiseration, again. Though no real solutions.

Bern said...

Hey there (I can't believe how plugged into the Matrix I am getting...). Anyway, I always medicated my kids at night (sans guilt, because really, what is the point of the guilt?)because I figured that way we were the most likely to act kindly to each other throughout the day. And I always hoped that a "good" night's sleep might set us up for "better" naps. Yes, to ibuprofen, because you can give it less frequently. During the day you might just have to ride out the crankies....(however you spell that). Some days I just gave in and napped next to little one; comfort for him, break for me. Good luck, Bernadette

pursuedbyabear said...

Honey.... you should read "Positive Discipline The First Three Years" I would just send it to you but I am trying to get hubby to read it. It's really helpful. It basically reminds you the babies POV. Anway, read it. I'm not saying that my husband was gone for a week on biz in Europe and I lost my temper and swatted my poor poopy butt on the tuckus because he threw a cup of water directly in my face, but you know.... I realized I needed some TOOLS.

Also, my boy is almost 2 now and I am here to tell you you are going to need a babysitter if you want to keep all your writing up, which you must. Because it is a god damn action flick around here, yo, all day all night party. GO go go freakin go. He takes a two hour nap (Praise Allah) and that's why I can write you now. I don't even know what I just said, I need more food and am desperately envious of NY in the fall. My fave.

http://www.amazon.com/Positive-Discipline-Toddler-Laying-Foundation-Confident/dp/0307341593/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1222112730&sr=1-1