As we all know, I have a bit of a thing about the money. Meaning, other people have far too much and I would like the chance to spend it for them. Watching a group of nine-year-olds swanning around Starbucks in $200 Tory Birch ballet flats can make a girl question her commitment to the youth of America. Then I discovered PocketchangeNYC.

Written by a character named "Richard Nouveau", it's the kind of snarky, intelligent, weirdly brilliant prose I wish I could master. The reviews generally have little to nothing to do with the subject ("When my parents endeavored to sell the rights to my biopic on the day I was born they only had one producer in mind. Then they forgot his name and retired to the solarium for Gin Rickeys with Jessica Tandy.") so if you're hoping for a genuine review of LA's Most Expensive Omelette, I'd suggest taking your fancy little self elsewhere. But if you like the funny (and the vaguely mean. Which I so, so do), check it out.

Although many of the reviews are hilarious, this one's my personal fave for reasons I'm not even sure I understand.