I just wanted to take a quick break from the sarcasm to address a concern.

I probably should have said this in my first post, but I want to make clear that everything on Flabbypants is meant to be humorous. While everything I write is based in some way on a genuine fear, everything should be taken with a grain - or barrel - of salt. (God I love salt...) This blog is in no way meant to make light of pregnancy; I'm strictly here as an entertaining read.

I am extremely grateful for my soon-to-be-born Possum and I do worry that my blog persona gives a different impression. I tend to assume that the only people reading this are friends and family - people who know that my writing voice is very, very different than the real me. My true, tender feelings are things that I save for my private journals. Flabbypants is meant to be about the universal pregnant-lady fears (getting fat, never pooping, feeling sorely undersexual) and taking them to a whole other level of neurosis. Nothing here should be be taken at face value.

While it's true that I only gained one pound during the first trimester, I hoped that earlier posts would make clear that there was no dieting involved. (Hello there, pots of mashed potatoes.) And while I do exercise daily, it has less to do with maintaining my figure and more about making labor as smooth as possible. But writing about those things isn't nearly as fun to mock as, say, my gigantor stomach. Do I get freaky about my weight? You betcha. But do I get FREAKY about my weight? Not even remotely.

Will I continue to bitch and blog? Of course. The site is called Flabbypants. But for those who worry that I've gone off the deep end, come have lunch with me sometime. Just don't forget the mashed potatoes.