Wednesday, April 8, 2009

My hand is starting to cramp

Man, it is exhausting falling off the face of the planet...

Before I get to the apologies, can I just say that I haven't made one stinkin' dime off these blog ads? It's not Blogher's fault - I suspect that we're paid by the amount of "unique" (meaning new) visitors to my site and mama's far too busy keeping the toddler alive to drum up business. Any fellow bloggers getting flush from selling space?

Back to apologies. Did I mention the sorry? I've been working my tail off pitching woo to a big-time ladies magazine, hoping to get some stuff bought. The editor is a dream (especially compared to the chilly reception I've garnered from certain other glossies. I'm talking to you, Unnamed Parenting Mag). I wrote almost 10 pitches in 4 days; not bad considering I can only work during naptime. I've discovered that I'm really good at writing short. Feature-length articles that are full of interviews and journalism and intellect are not my thing. Give me a piece on Tracy Feith's new line at Target (cuuuute!) and I'm all in. Unfortunately most places pay per word which doesn't bode well for my financial future but at least I'm never at a loss for party conversation.

Things here are good. The boy seems to have had a respite from the hell that was molars. After almost two weeks of terrible sleep (one night he was awake for almost 5 HOURS) he's back to full nights and reasonable naps. I suspect all this gorgeous sleep also has something to do with his newfound mobility - walking is coming on quick, peeps. We took Missy's advice and got him a walker a few weeks ago. He wasn't so keen at first but now he won't leave home (or his room) without it. He carts that thing around all over the place, bumping into furniture and tipping over like a grandpa on a bender. He wants to walk EVERYWHERE now. (With a little help from mama or the furniture or the cats of course.) He has also started climbing, which bodes ill. When you live in 700 square feet, finding outlets for toddler energy is tricky at best. (Oh god, I just got a flash of him at age 4...) My kingdom for a yard.

My mom's coming into town today which is about 17 kinds of awesome. My dad came up last week and it was just so nice seeing the baby with family. (Don't mention free babysitting... don't mention free babysitting...) My mom was about to chew her own arm off if she didn't get to see the boy soon and I can't wait to see her face when she lays eyes on our GIANT CHILD. Seriously, the kid is part Hulk. I can't decide if I'm proud of scared. (You should see the looks on people's faces when I tell them he's only 15 months...) We go in for his Well Baby appointment next week and I'm dying to know how much he weighs. According to my biceps it's about a zillion pounds.

I've been doing a lot of thinking about our 5 Year Plan which is always a bundle of laughs. I get the feeling that for most people, planning their future is an enjoyable conversation. I find it a little awful. Mostly because I have no idea what I want to be doing in 5 years. Scratch that - I know exactly what I want to be doing but after half a lifetime of chasing unrealistic expectations it's time to settle down and nut up. I know I should go back to school to teach but I just get all miserable inside thinking about it. I wish I wanted to. It sounds so great and noble and smart and yet all it brings to mind is a whole lot of frustration. I've worked with kids all my life and I really love them. I would like to keep loving them, which will not happen if I have to wrangle them all day. Years of babysitting and camp counseling and now motherhood have proven that I am not a font of patience and tend to get prickly if tested. Not exactly a recipe for Teacher of the Year. I've also thought about trying my hand at proofreading or copy editing (I'm not entirely sure of the difference between the two) but with the Death of Publishing being pronounced every seventh second, I'm wondering how much work there'll be for a newbie.

In other words, ugh.

How are your 5 year plans coming? Feel free to advise me on mine, those online career quizzes are useless. (Apparently I would make a fantastic Actor or Writer! Isn't that great?)


Bern said...

I hate the 5-year plan conversation. I have no idea what I want to do when I grow up (all I know is that I want to be home when my kids are home - from school, summer breaks, etc). I don't want to teach either. Like I said, no idea.....

PS. Welcome back

Fraulicious said...

Glad to see things are going well with your son. Am I the only one that doesn't have a 5-year plan? Right now, I'm just happy if I survive my current assignment at work and don't get roped into more of the same beyond November. But 5 years? Heck, I haven't even packed for our trip tomorrow. Actually, I haven't even done all the laundry. Better get on that. Sigh. :)

Tor said...

I have given up on 5yr plans. I used to have sensible, reasonable, realistically obtainable 5yr plans. Normal, boring plans. They always got derailed by freakishly unpredictable medical dramas. Serious, life-changing stuff. Several times. Each (both hubby and me). And all total flukes and out of our control. Crazy. Not only did we not achieve our initial plans, but we now have to undo some of what we did achieve as it is now unsuitable to our current situation. But knowing how much to undo and change means predicting what can reasonably be expected to happen in the future, which I am now loathe to do, having been burned so often in the past. So I am also stuck in a bit of a bind, having had to throw out our initial life-plans and normal expectations, but not sure where to aim now or how to go about it. I now also have a bit of a phobia about even developing any goals, like as soon as I identify them then that will cause something else to come from out of the blue to make things even worse. But with no direction anymore, I find myself drowning in the everyday. I keep reminding myself that things could be worse, but then worry that that means they will be LOL

electriclady said...

Maybe it's just me, but it seems like if something makes you get all miserable inside it's perhaps not the right thing to do.

I don't have a 5 year plan. Never really have. But this getting laid off thing and bad economy thing have sort of thrown me for a loop. I'm seeing a life coach right now to help me sort out some goals. Not 5 year plan goals, but broad directional goals. It's actually helping a lot.

Missy said...

I have been on Blogher for a while now and I have never seen one thin dime from it. Of course I have a ridiculously low number of visitors to my blog. I think the key to drumming up business is trolling and commenting on other people's blogs, which hopefully brings them to yours.

I lurk on many a blog and comment on VERY few, thus the lack of traffic on my own.

5 year plan...well it varies from being in private practice, being a school counselor or my personal favorite: Lady of Leisure Who Stays Home and Basks in the Glory of Her Lottery Winnings.

Woman with a Hatchet said...

Yup, trolling and commenting mightily is the way to drum up new eyeballs. Also, joining in on weekly bits like photography things, cooking, limericks, whatever thing is the current bandwagon of new eyeball goodness.

Once the twinness of my life overwhelmed me, I was all done with the going out and commenting and doing funky photography related things. Personally, people will just have to find me through my sheer flowing awesomeness! These days, I only comment on a very few blogs: yours being key among them. And oh the money I am not raking in! Woo! They wait until you've earned over $25 before cutting you a check. Took me over 6 months for that first check to come in. Wowsers!

As for a 5 year plan? I can't get get time together to plant my SEEDS for THIS year's garden, so I'm not the one to ask for long term plans. I'm just treading water until the twins go to kindergarten and THEN I'll see what I'm going to do.

Only 3.5 years to go! : )