25 Random Things About Me

I already did this list when it was called Seven Things About Me. Lucky for you I'm far too narcissistic to stop there -

1) I have a large scar that runs from underneath my left breast to the middle of my back. It's from the heart surgery I had when I was five. People often ask if it's from a boob job which makes me wonder what kind of pornos they're watching.

2) I wanted to be a professional ballet dancer from the ages of 10 to 17. When I realized that no matter how hard I tried I would never be good enough (or thin enough, or flexible enough) I stopped. I still love ballet and think that there is nothing better than sitting in Lincoln Center, listening to the orchestra.

3) I will never understand the appeal of a booze cruise.

4) I spent the bulk of the 4th grade pretending to be married to Prince.

5) Now I pretend to be a member of Guns 'N Roses.

6) Thinking back on it, I dated way too many musicians. Okay, 2. I dated 2.

7) I am constantly apologizing for my behavior during my 20's.

8) I harbor an immediate and intense dislike for people who use the phrase "Too much information", especially when that phrase is directed towards me.

9) I find cereal for breakfast depressing.

10) I hate peanut butter and jelly. Throughout the entirety of my childhood I would only eat soup, specifically bean with bacon or cream of potato. Soup is not a recipe for popularity in grade school.

11) I wish people still wrote letters.

12) I am not spontaneous or adventurous. Luckily I have friends, otherwise I'd never leave the house.

13) My friends convinced me that I was going bald in high school.

14) After losing track of each other for 6 years, my husband and I ran into each other on the subway and that, as they say, was that.

15) I once wore a Valentino gown to Valentino's birthday party. My job was to guard Steven Spielberg. Remind me to tell you about it sometime.

16) There are few things I enjoy more than a goodie bag.

17) I cannot be trusted around hors d'oeuvres.

18) I have a glass of wine every night. It's my reward for good behavior.

19) I cannot say the ABC's without singing the song or add without counting on my fingers.

20) I hate making decisions but once I do, good luck changing my mind.

21) I have always wanted to work on Sesame Street but am unable to sing, puppeteer, or do funny voices.

22) I wish I had a passion for nursing, science, or plumbing. I could use a job.

23) I hate getting manicures or pedicures.

24) I have been working on a novel for almost 3 years. I'm on Chapter 2.

25) As God is my witness, I will never work in food service or retail again.