So we've all heard that Madonna is remaking Casablanca, right? Oh. Well, Madonna's remaking Casablanca. And guess who starring in it? MADONNA! 'Cause who needs Ingrid Bergman when you've got Madge.
And in other news, it's the moment we (and by "we" I sure as shit mean "me") have all been waiting for: in next week's Rock of Love Brett Michaels finally appears SANS BANDANNA. (On a related note, last night I had a dream that I was on a date with Mr. Michaels. He was angling for a hummer, which I wisely refused to give. Good to know that even my subconscious knows better than to sexually service a man in a wig.)