Thursday, October 25, 2007

Stick it to Whitey!

Yesterday marked a milestone, peeps, a motherfarking milestone: For the first time during my eight months of pregnancy, a white man offered me a seat on the subway.

I know. I couldn't believe it either.

Fearing cries of racism, I hesitated to write this (is it racist if you're railing against your own?) but seriously, somebody needs to talk to whitey. I know making like Mr. Monopoly is tiring but c'mon, give the fat lady a break. All you've done is sit at your desk all day! How hard can it be to stand for five minutes? And it's not just the men; us white ladies suck too. Occasionally a white woman will offer up her seat which is lovely - until I discover that she was squeezed next to someone stinky.

It's not even that I need to sit all the time, but when I see some guy staring at my stomach (and we've all seen it! Not like it can be missed!) and he doesn't make a move? Oooh, that burns. Sometimes I get all passive-aggressive and just stare at him, laser-like, until I reach my stop. Usually he just buries his head in his paper and pretends that I don't exist.


Now black women? Latinas? They know what's up. I can always count on them and for that I am truly grateful. (Especially during rush hour when giving up your seat is practically cause for canonization.) But fellow Caucasians? You and me needs to talk...


Amanda said...

Damn Crackers!!

Wannabeyummy said...

You are hilarious!! I was JUST talking about this the other day about how i never got a seat on the bus when I was preggers..

I am half white and hale latina and b/c I never got a seat, if some terrible horrible thing happens and I have to end up on the bus again, I will give my seat! Actually, I've ALWAYS done that for elderly ppl.

BTW, couldn't agree more with the "at the desk all day" comment!